Posts

Fear of Driving

-
Image
In April 2021, I took my first driving class. Since then it was roller coaster ride in personal life. Finally in August 2022, I restarted my driving practice in Maruti 800 with my sister. This was my first time on a vehicle. I lacked road sense, had loads of unknown fear, feared every tiny thing on road. Even a slightest noise or sound while driving would startle me and if sound was from back, I would turn back. Then began my sister’s wedding preparations in March 2023. Now there was no choice. We were in road almost 12 hours a day. Driving to charminar, banjara hills, jublee hills, secunderabad all over the city. After couple of days in Maruti 800, we switched to Baleno. Summers were unbearable without ac in car. My gradual practice in baleno suddenly turned into drives to begum bazar, late night koti market along with my sister. Towards the end it was solo driving to all kinds of narrow congested roads in kushaiguda market for paper plates, water bottles, nagaram for ice cream, ecil
2 comments
Read more

The three gunas

-
The 3 gunas are Sattva, Rajas and Tamas.  Sattva is the enthusiasm I feel in life. I was just having a conversation with my Yogi friends with whom I take online yoga classes. We would share nice anecdotes by Gurudev, pull each other’s leg, talk about doing Seva, discuss about the seva and impact other folks are having. It was 11:30 pm but still energy was high and had beauty care routine with head massage, face pack going strong till 12:30. But then slept post that because wanted to keep up the morning routine. Normal days I would be asleep and drowsy by 10:30. Good influence, sattvic talks & discussions always helps Sattva go high. Rajas is needed in life. I work in software industry which can be very demanding at times. High Rajas actually helps get a lot of work done. But sometime when Rajas is too high my mind just goes haywire. Unable to focus to get anything done. Start doing multiple tasks at a time and just be confused and upset at not completing any task by the end of the
Post a Comment
Read more

Why do you feel sad?

-
Image
Sadness happens when you don’t get what you expect. Self is looking for joy everywhere. For example: it gets attracted to a plate of pastry. Who is attracted? Actually, it is the senses getting attracted to an object, i.e. Pastry. That plate of pastry gives a lot of joy. But where is the joy? Is it in the pastry or the sense i.e. tasting it or something deep within. Many folks think it is in the pastry. So that’s why, after finishing a plate of pastry, you run behind another plate of pastry. But how many can you have? You have 10, 20, 50… At one point you get saturated. That plate of pastry doesn’t give joy anymore. If pastry was giving joy, then more pastry should give more joy. But that’s not true. So, where is the joy coming from? Joy comes when the tongue tastes the pastry, it sends signals deep within evoking the joy within. That joy comes at the peak of an experience. The joy is within. There is a limit to which senses can enjoy an object. Beyond that, the senses get saturated an
1 comment
Read more

Yoga- kshema

-
 Yoga-kshema is maintaining what you have and bringing up what you are lacking. When you are completely one with the divine, the divine takes care of you. Divine provides what you lack and maintains what you already poses. Only very recently I realized I have always been in the lacking mindset. For example: when I get my work done in office, I would focus more on what is left than what is done. Infact such work updates didn’t send positive vibrance about me. Though I got a lot done but acknowledgement was missing. After realizing I started sharing all the updates of work completed for the day and then share what needs to be done and I saw an immediate shift in acknowledgement and appreciation.  Even in life in general, when I scroll through Facebook, Instagram, we see people getting married, people visiting new places, wear bright beautiful clothes, looking beautiful and the thought that comes is oh I am not marries, I didn’t go to that place, I don’t have good clothes, all my clothes
1 comment
Read more

Surrender as I understand

-
Surrender is letting go. Surrender is not giving up. Surrender is to not hold on to anything. Be it a result of action or a thing or a memory or an emotion or a future event. Only when you are completely free, the present moment can be experienced with full awareness. For that full vibrant awareness, there is a desire to be free. Freedom means no bondage. No bondage from desire, emotion, materialistic craving or any craving. For the desire to become free, we need to surrender. I lived in Seattle downtown for 3 years and in the US for 4.5 years. I always knew I had to come back to India, but unknowingly, I developed an attachment to the place, the waterfront near my house, the people, the friends I made. The thought of letting go of all that attachment and becoming free was difficult. But I could see that unless I felt free I couldn’t enjoy the current moment. There was always anticipation of the future, of when I should return to India. So, I just had to make a decision. I set an appro
1 comment
Read more

Action in inaction and inaction in action

-
Image
Action in inaction is seeing action while you think you are still. For example, while meditating you are sitting still. In deep meditation, even your mind is still. But, you can see a lot of activity happening. The heart is functioning, food is digesting in the body, the body is breathing and so on. These are actions that may not create impressions/samskaras since they don’t generate reaction as a result. Inaction in action is the feeling of stillness within while in action. For example, you could be working on a computer or cooking, your karmendriyas and jnanedriyas could be busy acting and receiving the response of action. But even through these actions, you can experience stillness within. One way that I felt it was when I was consciously breathing through my work. First, it was a conscious effort. After that, I, as an observer, could see the action happening when my mind and arms were working. But the observer felt detached and still unwavering towards the action the body & min
Post a Comment
Read more

Bhakti yoga as I understand & feel it

-
Bhakti is a path to dissolving into infinity. Bhakti is a path to become one with infinity. Bhakti is being a true devotee to the divine nature. A devotee is someone who serves the divine with utmost love. Divine is the pure consciousness which is omnipresent, omnipotent and omniscient. Divinity is within us. Bhakti is the path to meet with this divinity within. The other way to see it is everyone around us also has the divinity within. So, serving others is serving the divine. Bhakti is then serving others because serving others is serving the divinity. From the Bhagavad Gita, this is the Daasyam form of bhakti. We can achieve oneness with the divine through Bhakti when we start seeing divine in everyone. I-ness or the ego drops when Bhakti arises. A Bhakta when he/she has obstacles in his/her daily life, he/she knows that they are coming from the divine. This shift in thought changes the perspective of a situation from an obstacle to an opportunity to get closer to divine. Since afte
1 comment
Read more